Looking back at my growing up years and the relationships I've had with guys, I think I have been very, very blessed. I have had my share of frogs of course, but nothing really bad. I never got into a destructive relationship where a guy would cheat on me and I will go back to him, or a guy will blatantly disrespect me, or (gasp!) hit me. There's no way I was going to let that happen to me. And God being so good, He didn't allow me to be led astray. I'm quite sure this blessing is a result of my mum praying for her daughters, so that we won't make mistakes in our relationships and marriages.
I had 4 (more like three and a half) boyfriends before I started going out with the man I got married to. Like most girls, I also had guys I had a crush on, guys that had crushes on me, guys as my best friends at some point, toasters and the guys that purely want to take advantage of you. I was a quiet girl (I still am) and sometimes, guys thought it meant I was easy to take advantage of, but thank God none of them succeeded.
I had my first 'boyfriend' when I was 16 which was kinda late as most of my friends had been in relationships since they were 13 or so. The 'relationship' was mostly over the telephone and I remember my dad grumbling at some point then because our phone bills sky-rocketed during that time. The guy was my friend's cousin and he saw my picture with her whilst visiting their house one day and he said he liked my picture and wanted to get to know me. She introduced us, and that's how we started talking. The guy was nice and the 'relationship' was short and sweet. It lasted almost a year. It ended without fuss or tears when I got bored and that was it.
Boyfriend number 2 was more interesting. I was 17 at this time. One day a girl friend of mine came to visit me and we were gisting when my phone rang, and it was a guy asking to speak to Michael. I told him there was no one called Michael and he must have the wrong number and I hung up. Two minutes later, the guy calls back and asks for Michael again. I told him again that he has the wrong number and then before I hang up he says he likes my voice. I said thank you. He stored my number and started calling me often and we became phone pals. Then one day we decide to meet up so I ask my friend to come over in case there is any scary stuff (you never know!). Thinking about it now, it was quite risky but at the time it was all fun and excitement. To cut the long story short, he came to my house with his cousin, who fell in love with my friend and all four of us started hanging out together. He was nice, tall and good looking and the relationship was progressing well. Then about 6 months later, I had to leave the country to go and read my books and things changed. The guy started pestering me to sleep with him before I leave. I told him that I wasn't going to. I asked him what would become of us when we are in separate countries. We agreed to give it a try to stay together and keep in touch as much as possible. So we said our goodbyes. I came to England and of course we didn't keep in touch properly and things went downhill. In any case, we broke up after a year and I moved on.
You guessed it, by this time, I had several other guys on my case who were only too glad to take BF2's place. There was this guy (the half) who was a former classmate from secondary school in Nigeria who was quite keen. We used to hang out, gist on the phone, go to the cinema together and stuff, so he became my unofficial boyfriend, even though I saw him as a friend not as a boyfriend. Silly me eh? One day I visited him at home and the guy came on to me so strongly that I bolted out of his house and never went back. He kept on calling me to apologise and beg but I wasn't having any of it and that was the end of that.
That will be all for now. I'm going to continue in my next post....